Joel's Thoughts

Joel, Cameron & Forrest

2011-01-27T19:31:00.001-06:00

Joel, Cameron & Forrest
Originally uploaded by katiemaners

Great day for a bike ride!

Lost Boy...Found!

2008-08-07T20:32:00.003-05:00

Meet Lopez Lamong. This week he'll be the flag bearer for the US Olympic team as they present themselves in the Olympic stadium in Bejing. But more than being just a flag bearer, Lamong will be raising awareness of the plight of the people of Darfur. You can read the entire story here.

I Hate BC

2008-07-14T23:45:00.002-05:00

I just found out Sunday that a friend at ours church was just diagnosed with breast cancer. God, I hate this disease! All this brings back so many memories from last year. Allot of it I chose to forget, until now.

Ooma

2008-06-18T21:54:00.002-05:00

We just hooked up our Ooma phone switch. Basically, once you buy the converter, you never pay for phone service again. Here's a review by Walter Mossberg:

It's all about me....

2008-06-05T15:09:00.002-05:00

I'm not a regular viewer of the Daily Show but this clip was just too funny to pass up.

Show me....

2008-05-28T23:17:00.001-05:00

Goodbye Maria

2008-05-26T11:19:00.002-05:00

For those of you who have been following the tragedy surrounding the Steven Curtis Chapman family, here is a description of the memorial service for Maria. She passed away a few days ago when she was struck by an SUV at her home in Nashville.

Let me get this straight...

2008-05-09T23:41:00.002-05:00

You got fired for having what at the White House? I thought we got over this back in the 90's.

The Conversion of Leon

2008-05-04T21:08:00.003-05:00

In many ways, this is an ordinary story of someone becoming a Christian. In other ways it's quite extraordinary. You see, Leon was a rather important figure in the town where he lived. He owned a large jewelry store and was known far and wide for his beautiful creations.
Consequently, he was quite wealthy and well known throughout the city and region where he lived.

But Leon wasn't worldly with his wealth. He was, in fact, a very religious person. He prayed and worshiped God regularly and was very active in his local religious community which met at a local park. Because he lived in a large house, it was often the site of many meetings and get togethers.

One Saturday, a man named Paul along with his traveling partners showed up at the park where Leon's community worshiped and prayed. Paul spoke of a man named Jesus who came to save mankind from their sins. After spending some time listening to Paul and asking many questions, Leon slowly came to have faith in Jesus. Leon and his entire family were baptized and became believers. In fact, many people in Leon's community became believers through Paul's preaching and teaching. Leon invited Paul and his traveling partners into his home and provided them a place to stay while they ministered there.

Now, given what you know about the story of Leon, what role do you think he would have played in this new church. Would you have called him an Elder or Deacon? At the very least, you would have considered him to be a leader in his church. As a leading member of the city and community, he would have had a important role in the leadership. At the very least, you would probably say that Leon would be very influential.

Of course, that is what you would think. But what if Leon were actually a woman and her name was Lydia? Given the same story, what would you have assumed about Lydia? Would you have assumed some leadership role for her? If not, why? What role would Lydia assume? Read Acts 16 carefully. I wonder how our prejudices against female leadership shape our view of this text.

Good Report

2008-05-01T00:12:00.002-05:00

We got a good report from the surgeon on Traci's mammogram on Tuesday. She still has some scar tissue from the complications from the surgery but other than that, she's all clear. We go back to see the oncologist next month. The next mammogram is in 6 months.

In Te Domine

2008-04-23T23:26:00.002-05:00

This song is perhaps my favorite worship song of all time. It's based on a short phrase found in Psalm 31, "In you O Lord" or "In Te Domine" in Latin. Here are the lyrics.

I try to sing this song
I...I try to stand up
But I can't find my feet
I try, I try to speak up
But only in you I'm complete

Gloria...in te domine
Gloria...exultate
Gloria...Gloria
Oh Lord, loosen my lips

I try to sing this song
I...I try to get in
But I can't find the door
The door is open
You're standing there
You let me in

Gloria...in te domine
Gloria...exultate
Oh Lord, if I had anything
Anything at all
I'd give it to you
I'd give it to you

Gloria...Gloria...

Prepared again!

2008-04-18T15:46:00.001-05:00

Prepared

2008-04-15T13:27:00.000-05:00

Sometimes you have to be prepared for just about anything.

Jonah's Judgement

2008-04-10T13:48:00.005-05:00

Last night our mid-week Bible class studied the book of Jonah. It's one of the more popular stories with both parents and children. If it weren't in the Bible, it would be decried as too violent a story for children, what with a man being thrown into churning waters and being swallowed whole by a gigantic sea creature. Yeah, that's a great idea for a children's book. I remember hearing this story as a young boy feeling as if I had snuck into a PG-13 movie. But make no mistake, parents love telling the story too. The moral seems to be, if you disobey God, your friends will throw you off the boat and you'll get swallowed by a whale. Sounds like an episode of Survivor.

But the book of Jonah is so much more than a fish story. Only a couple of verses even mention the fish. In essence, the story of Jonah is about God's justice. God lays down the word to Jonah in the first couple of verses. "Go to Nineveh, the great city and preach against it because it's wickedness has come up before me." Now to read that command and to read of Jonah's hatred of the Assyrians, you would think that he's be more than happy to stick that message in their face.

But Jonah understood that God's idea of justice and his idea of justice were two different things entirely. Jonah wanted God's vengeance to consume the Ninevites. After all, these people had committed profound atrocities that are still being talked about today. But Jonah also knew that God's justice was different. It opened the possibilty for repentance, forgiveness and reconciliation, and Jonah wanted no part of that.

I always thought growing up that Jonah was ignorant and naive. I thought he was ignorant because he thought he could run away and hide from God. I thought he was naive in that he thought he could simply get away with not obeying God without consequences. But his actions and his words seem to indicate that he knew exactly who God was and what he was capable of. Jonah wasn't hiding from God, he was rebelling against God. And when the sailors ask him the rhetorical question, "Why did you do this?" everyone on the boat knew that Jonah was underestimating God. There was no getting away from God's justice. Just as God was pursuing the Ninevites, he was also pursuing Jonah.

Many times, i think that I am far more like Jonah than I'd care to admit. My idea of justice is too often more like Jonah's than God's. The real test for me is, how do I feel when those who have wronged me, receive grace and forgiveness. Am I more interested in them being made whole or in me getting my revenge? I wonder how often we get revenge and justice mixed up.

Handicap Parking

2008-04-04T22:53:00.006-05:00

There are some things that just don't make sense to me. Tonight I had to go to Sam's to pickup some things for a party. On the way out I noticed a guy pull into one of those handicap parking spaces. I waited to see just how handicapped this guy really was. As I watched him limp into the store, I wondered, why do we go to such lengths to save this guy a few steps to the front door yet he is going to walk aisles and aisles once he's inside? No. He didn't use a wheelchair once inside either.

Years ago as they were building a local shopping center. I noticed that they were setting aside what seemed like 10% of the spaces in the parking lot for handicap parking. "Why are they setting aside so many spaces? Are there really that many handicapped people?" I thought to myself. It turns out that those concerns were unfounded. Within a few years, the demand for handicap parking seemed to outstrip demand. Now, all of the spaces are filled around the clock.

I remember when I was a kid that there were not that many handicap spaces and the ones that were there, often went unused. When they were used, they were used by people who really needed them, people who were bound to wheelchairs or seriously disabled. Now it seems that all it takes to be eligible for one of those blue cards is to be morbidly obese or have a limp.

I have this idea that one day instead of a few handicap parking places being at the front, all of the spaces will be handicap and there will be a hierarchy of parking based on just how disabled a person is. Wheel-chaired people in the front with those wide berths, pregnant women in the back and various levels of obesity and joint pain sufferers in between. We could even color code the permits to the spaces. Those who are able bodied will just have to park in the unmarked spaces toward the back. Of course the fact that the obese will be walking shorter distances to the store will just insure that they will get less and less exercise and thus grow more and more disabled. I guess that as time goes by, we'll all move up the parking hierarchy until one day we'll all get a great place to park. I just hope I live long enough and become disabled just enough to enjoy it.

Tearing down a church

2008-04-03T16:05:00.002-05:00

Nearly every day, I pass this vacant church building on the way to work. There's been a for sale sign in the yard for a while now. It' not that old of a building, maybe 10 to 15 years. But it's been unoccupied for the past several years. Over time it has fallen into disrepair. Some of the shingles blew off in a storm a few years back, some of the siding fell off and the yard and flower beds have been taken over by weeds.

But a couple of days ago I was a bit shocked to see that the church was being demolished. There where the church used to be was a pile of broken wood, insulation and brick being raked back and forth by a big backhoe. There will probably be a convenience store built in its place very soon. I guess I just never imagined that they would tear it down. It just had become an ingrained part of the landscape for me.

But the tearing down of the church got me to thinking. What happened at this new congregation that didn't work out? Was there fighting and bickering that led to it's downfall? Did the church just borrow more than they could pay back? Where are all the members of this church now? What would thy think if they saw all their hopes and dreams being crushed by a backhoe? And I wonder if we could envision the same thing happening at the place where we go to church?

A Word to the Churches

2008-03-27T08:51:00.003-05:00

One of the more interesting sections of the book of Revelation is the letters to the 7 churches of Asia. It's amazing how relevant they remain. It's apparent from reading them that they reflect a deep love and concern for the church, not just locally but universally as well. It's also interesting to note that the churches are judged as fellowships and not just individual members. Scripture takes the concept of the church as "the body of Christ" seriously.

But thankfully, letters of this sort are not just limited to scripture. I think that God still prompts many to write letters today. While they may not be inspired or authoritative, they do reflect a deep love and concern for the church. And like the letters of Revelation, they are timeless and profitable to other churches and situations as well.

The following is an example of a letter written by a friend of mine to his local congregation. He writes this from a very personal point of view so I have edited out the personal references. I hope you find his words as meaningful and timeless as I did.

____________________________________________

To my Church family,

Three years ago, my wife and I faced an agonizing decision. We thought God was leading us to move, but it was not the easiest choice to make. One of the reasons for that was because we loved our church so much and hated to leave it. We were uncertain we would find a comparable church in our new home.

But after joining our new church, we discovered quickly that our initial fears were unfounded. In recent days we have seen more clearly than ever how gracious God was to us in leading us here. We are so grateful for you, for our godly elders and for God's continued blessings upon our church.

I write to you today to sound a warning -- one that I am more mindful about now than ever. I say this not because there are problems in our church to be addressed, but because we always need to be guardians of what God has entrusted to us. Traps and snares are all around us if we become careless, conceited and complacent.

We must not take God's blessings upon us for granted. We must not grow slack in our pursuit of holiness, or in our concern for one another's welfare and sanctification. We must not grow accommodating of sin in our midst -- especially the sowing of dissension and division that can rob us of the unity we all value so deeply.

Trust me, I know this from experience.

In three short years since leaving our previous church, I have watched from a distance as it has unraveled and become the very thing it once so adamantly stood against. Sin gained a foothold and was allowed to fester. This was a church that was once characterized by a warm fellowship and a union around its leadership and the gospel. That is no longer the case, and it breaks my heart to see what a once-great church has become.

Too many selfish church members insisted on continuously griping and complaining about the smallest of matters (like what summer youth camp to attend). All the while, they made life miserable for a couple of godly men on staff who had devoted many years of their lives in service to the church. Where there was once unity, backbiting and petty bickering became common. Where there was once selflessness, selfishness is prevalent. Where there was once a love for holiness and righteousness, blatant sin now goes unaddressed.

Without going into detail, those most responsible for the church's collapse are the gossips, slanderers, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, foolish, faithless, heartless and ruthless that Paul describes in Romans 1. Rather than putting the welfare of the church and its members first, they chose instead to become instruments of Satan, and to divide and destroy a church that had been built so faithfully over so many years.

They lifted their hands and voices against the Lord and His anointed leaders, and in doing so forced the resignations of these two men of God. For that, they will have their reward. We can learn much by making sure we never follow their pattern.

This wasn't a situation that developed overnight, but one that gradually deteriorated over a period of months and years. And as is often the case, the problems in that church are caused by a small minority who insist on having things their way, even if it causes strife and destruction to the church for which Christ died. In doing so, they have succeeded in thwarting the interests and desires of the majority. My heart breaks for those in the church -- my dear brothers and sisters in Christ -- who have remained faithful to God. They deserved better than to have the church they loved hijacked by a vocal few.

Looking back now after seeing how things have developed, we can only thank God for His remarkable kindness to us in removing us from that place, and in bringing us here, where we don't have to deal with anything of the sort.

I write these words not primarily to accuse my old church or anyone therein. God Himself will handle that, and I tremble to think about what some people there will be reaping. These are people I once loved and believed to be godly men and women of integrity. But they have proven my former opinions of them to be gravely wrong, and I fear that some of them were never regenerate in the first place. They have sown discord and strife, and I do not believe that will go unpunished.

Instead, I write these words to you as a warning about what can happen if we become complacent and comfortable in what we have. We must be ever vigilant to fight sin fiercely -- in ourselves and in the lives of our fellow church members. We must respect, support and encourage our elders, who labor among us so faithfully in teaching God's word. We must love one another with a selfless love and always look for ways to serve and minister to each other. We must pray for each other. I will be the first to confess that I do not pray for you the way that I should. I ask for your forgiveness, and I pledge to do better.

And if we ever find ourselves in a position where we cannot support the church or its leadership, we must have enough integrity to leave in peace, and find another place where we can serve. My former church could have been spared so much heartache if the malcontents had simply left for another church. But they loved their sin more than they loved Christ and His church, so they acted dishonorably and stayed where they could be the devil's agents to sow division. We must never do likewise.

God has indeed blessed us, but that does not give us license to slacken in our diligence or chill in our devotion to Jesus Christ and His church. We must hold fast what we have, and continue to entrust ourselves to the One who is able to keep us from stumbling.

I thank God for planting my family here. My prayer and desire is that God will allow me to labor alongside you for the rest of my earthly pilgrimage, until we are one day presented complete in Christ, so that God will be glorified above all things.

"I lied."

2008-03-26T13:37:00.008-05:00

When I was a kid my friends and I would get together and play a vicious game of Monopoly. I say vicious because we would do or say virtually anything to win. It was sort of a tongue in cheek game to see who could get away with the most vile behavior. Call it business ethics 80's style. I remember one game when one of my fellow players was caught not living up to a promise he has maid to another player. When the guy protested, he matter-of-factly responded, "Well, there's a simple explanation ... I lied." Then he went on as if nothing had happened.

I remembered that incident while reading this exerpt from Carl Bernstein's forthcoming book on Hillary Clinton.

“Since her Arkansas years, Hillary Rodham Clinton has always had a difficult relationship with the truth… [J]udged against the facts, she has often chosen to obfuscate, omit, and avoid. It is an understatement by now that she has been known to apprehend truths about herself and the events of her life that others do not exactly share.”

I think it was Leon Trotsky, the Russian revolutionary who spoke of the importance of "calling things by their proper names." If that's true, then I wish Hillary would address her most recent "mis-statements" regarding her trip to Bosinia by simply stating, "I lied." At least in that glorious moment, we know that we could trust that she was telling the truth.

Right or Left Brain

2008-03-25T10:02:00.006-05:00

This is an interesting test. If you see silhouette rotating clockwise, you are right brained, if you see it rotating counter clockwise, you are left brained. If you can make the image switch directions, you are a part of a small minority of the population that can see a situation differently depending on the situation.

In case you are wondering, at first I saw the girl rotation clockwise, but after a little practice, I found I could make her rotate either direction almost at will. My brain still seems to gravitate to clockwise though.

Easter and Eggs

2008-03-25T00:10:00.002-05:00

I always used to wonder how eggs got into Easter. Oh yes I know all the stories of pagan worship and whatnot. But why do we still have this ritual of hunting eggs even after Easter Sunday worship services at church? Isn't this some sort of inconsistency. What does gorging yourself on sugary candy eggs have to do with the risen Christ anyway?

But then after my children came along, I got it. Easter eggs are about the joy of discovery. You just have to love the way kids squeal with delight at discovering a brightly colored egg in the grass. When I see the joy of that moment, I am reminded of the disciples at Jesus tomb on that early Sunday morning. Easter is about finding something amazing and beautiful in the midst of the mundane. It's about finding life in a place of death, peace in a place of chaos.

New Games

2008-03-19T16:07:00.003-05:00

I just love how my boys invent new games out of nowhere. Yesterday they got this idea to combine tennis, wrestling and jumping on the trampoline all into one big bruhaha. It was crazy. Then we just decided to drop all pretenses and go straight to the kung-fu fighting. Boys certainly are not boring.

Captain Cane

2008-03-14T21:38:00.005-05:00

One of the fun things about college sports is the team mascots. You know, those guys who walk around with those oversized heads. You just never know what they are going to do next. Most are funny and entertaining but others are either gross or just plain hideous. But every once in a while you run across one that is just so hideous, it creates a buzz but by being there.

Last night I went to the tournament and saw a couple of games. I missed the early game which featured Tulsa and UAB. I heard so much about the Tulsa mascot that I just had to stick around to see it after the U of M game tonight. I thought I was the only one with a macabre sense of curiosity but there were a few guys sitting behind me that were chatting about the Tulsa mascot as well.

I have to say that Captain Cane certainly lives up to his billing. What's this thing supposed to be? A beehive? A golden carrot? I just love the facial expression and the blue gloves are just priceless. When the cheerleaders came out to do their routine, the audience was doubled over with laughter. It was definitely worth the price of the ticket.

Here is a list of some of the others you might not want to miss.

1 in 8

2008-03-10T21:02:00.002-05:00

Last year while Traci was being treated for breast cancer, I heard a frightening statistic. One out of every eight women will have to deal with breast cancer at some point in her life. One in eight. It's easy to let numbers simply be numbers but the number eight has special significance to me. When my daughter plays soccer, they play 8 vs. 8 on the field. So when I go to a tournament, I see 2 teams of 8 girls playing on fields all over the park. If the statistics hold true, one girl on each side will get breast cancer. That one is not just a number.To me, it's one of those young women running down the field. That one is someone's daughter or sister and one day will be someone's wife or mother.

As astonishing as that is, I recently read this quote by Dr. Larry Norton.

One message that shocks audiences when I give talks is that the NCI budget is a dollar and a quarter per American per month. Is that how frightened of cancer we are, that we’re willing to put just a dollar and a quarter per month into the kitty to defeat cancer? If that really measures how frightened we are of cancer, then we have to really go back and look carefully about what the actual risks are. Most people estimate their risk of developing cancer in the single digits, and don’t realize that a third to a half of us are going to die of this disease.

One day we'll have to look at one of those little girls in the eye and tell them that we only put a dollar and a quarter a month into beating this beast. God help us.

Favre's Retirement

2008-03-07T11:43:00.001-06:00

I'll miss Bret Favre but probably not as much as Frank Caliendo.

Gary Gygax R.I.P.

2008-03-05T11:41:00.002-06:00

Gary Gygax, running low on hit points with no healing potions in site, finally gives up the ghost and passes ad astra.

Soccer Season

2008-03-05T11:37:00.002-06:00

Sorry to be so delinquent in my posting lately. It's soccer season and it's been pretty hectic. Right now I'm coaching a U-10 team and managing a U-11 travel team. You can read about our latest exploits on my soccer blog.

First the Van, Now the Notebook

2008-02-27T12:00:00.003-06:00

My notebook computer crashed last night. I know that you can't die from a computer crash but it really makes life difficult. I've lost a bunch of e-mails as well as my address book. Sure I could just go out and buy a replacement but I can't replace my data. It's going to take a while to recover from this.

Van Replaced

2008-02-25T23:07:00.002-06:00

We found a van to replace our demolished one. I had to keep myself from laughing out loud when the insurance adjuster said that he would have to send someone out to the junk yard to make sure it was totaled (it was). The whole side of the van was peeled open like a can of sardines. Fortunately, I was able to find a Honda Odyssey very similar to ours. Our old one was white and the new one is a dark blue. The new one has about 7,000 fewer miles on it as well. We broke it in with a skiing trip to North Carolina for the girls this past weekend . We went with some other folks and their kids. We all had a good time enjoying the last bit of winter before the spring thaw. I'm hoping for better times as the weather warms up.

Accident

2008-02-13T23:56:00.003-06:00

Traci was involved in an auto accident this morning. She's a little shaken and she's got a couple of cuts from broken glass and she had some glass in her eye, but other than that, she's doing pretty good. She'll be sore for the next few days though.

Basically she was hit by a runaway trailer. A pickup was towing a trailer that came unhitched. We discovered that the tongue and hitch ball were different sizes. They also did not have the trailer secured to the truck correctly with chains. The witnesses say that after it came unhitched, it followed the truck a little bit, then darted across the road. Traci said it came at her so fast she didn't have time to react.

The trailer hit the driver's side right behind the driver's side door. The whole door was sheered off and the sliding door was mangled. I keep the registration in a door pocket on the driver's side so it took a little work to locate it. I kept expecting to see the door somewhere but it was ripped apart into several unrecognizable pieces. The B pillar was crushed in about a foot. If anyone had been sitting behind Traci, they would have been seriously injured or killed. I am glad that the kids were not with her. Cameron usually sits in that seat.

I'll have to go get the police report tomorrow and start the process of getting us a new van. It's a pain but it could have been a whole lot worse.

Courage to Question

2008-02-11T09:19:00.002-06:00

If you aren't familiar with churches of Christ you may not realize what a "third rail" instrumental music is in some of the more conservative circles of our brotherhood. Accappella music is the groupthink orthodoxy that is never questioned. Those who do approach the subject with any hint of open mindedness do so at their own peril. Consequently, we have theological elephants in the room that no one discusses. Sure, there are many whispers in private conversations but rarely does anyone challenge the orthodoxy in a public forum.

So I was astonished that Les Bonnett, a preacher from Collierville, Tennesse approached the subject at chapel at FHU last week. He pursues a question that came up at Open Forum last year. "Why do we choose to use instrumental music as a dividing line when we have many other differences that we accept?" It's a good question that we are simply too afraid to confront. At least there is one brave soul who's willing to point out our arrogance and hypocrisy.

If you'd like to hear the message and you have iTunes installed on your computer, click here, then click on 2008 Bible Lectureship, then download the 10:30 message on 2-7-2008. If you don't have iTunes, you can download and install it here.

________________________________________

Update: You can now download the sermon here as well.

HT Matt

The Voice of the Lord

2008-02-07T09:50:00.000-06:00

Ascribe to the LORD, O mighty ones,
ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.

Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name;
worship the LORD in the splendor of his holiness.

The voice of the LORD is over the waters; the God of glory thunders, the LORD thunders over the mighty waters.

The voice of the LORD is powerful; the voice of the LORD is majestic.

The voice of the LORD breaks the cedars; the LORD breaks in pieces the cedars of Lebanon. He makes Lebanon skip like a calf, Sirion like a young wild ox.

The voice of the LORD strikes with flashes of lightning.

The voice of the LORD shakes the desert; the LORD shakes the Desert of Kadesh.

The voice of the LORD twists the oaks and strips the forests bare. And in his temple all cry, "Glory!"

The LORD sits enthroned over the flood; the LORD is enthroned as King forever.
The LORD gives strength to his people; the LORD blesses his people with peace.

-Psalm 29

Tuesday was "Super Tuesday" here in Tennessee and across the nation. It may not be the day we select a president but it's close. It was expected that the number of candidates would be whittled down to a handful with primaries in Tennessee and other states across the nation.

Every time I vote I get a bit of a rush. To vote is to exercise one's power. It's amazing to think that the political power in this country eminates from such a simple act as voting. It's difficult to imagine what it must feel like for those who have lived under authoritarian governments to experience the freedom of voting for the first time. It is one of the few moments where those in positions of power must subjugate their will to that of the people.

But the events of Tuesday night drew a stark contrast. After experiencing the power of voting in a presidential primary, we were subjected to the feelings of powerlessness of having a tornado devastate parts of our city. There is no power on earth that can stop a tornado and it's destructive winds. All you can do is huddle in your closet and hope for the best.

Since the storm passed, we have all been astonished at the destruction left in its wake. Trees are twisted and broken, homes have been torn apart and light poles are bent and broken like matchsticks, cars and semis have been tossed around like toys in a sandbox. It's an awesome display of power.

As I was driving back home yesterday, I thought of this psalm written by David nearly 3000 years ago. I imagine that this was the response of others in his time who had seen a tornado or some other such storm. David refers to his listeners as "Mighty Ones." It's easy to think of yourself this way when you are voting. After all, who has all of the power in that situation. But David says, "Ascribe to the Lord glory and strength. Ascribe the the Lord the glory due his name." Just when we think that we have control over our lives, just when we think that we can control our own destiny, the voice of the Lord comes and it silences us. We realize how powerless we really are and how powerful he is. It is not us who are the "Mighty Ones." No, he is the Mighty One.

But David reminds us that as powerful as God's voice is, his intent is not to wipe his people from the earth. He "gives strength" and "blesses" his people with peace. So even as I see the destruction that accompanies the tornado, I am reminded of God's grace and care. The voice of God may "strip the forests bare" but we all cry "holy!" in peace, knowing that it is the voice of our Father in heaven.

More Photos

2008-02-06T13:28:00.001-06:00

Here are some additional photos from the damage at Union university.

Thanks j razz!

http://bloggeddownworld.blogspot.com/

Tornadoes!

2008-02-06T10:05:00.001-06:00

The tornadoes that tore through Jackson missed us by a couple of blocks. Union University got hit hard though. You can see the photos here and here. Please keep those who were effected in your prayers. It's going to take a while to get everything cleaned up and back to normal.

Superbowl Burnout

2008-01-31T09:41:00.001-06:00

Is it just me or am I the only one who is just tired of hearing about the Superbowl. It seems like a month now that all the sportscasters and talking heads have been debating is "are the Patriots the best team ever", and "what do we think about them if they win the Superbowl and where will they rank if they lose." At this point I just don't care. I'll enjoy watching the game but please,let's put an end to the talk. It's past time to get this game over with.

"A purse with holes in it."

2008-01-30T09:07:00.000-06:00

Now this is what the LORD Almighty says: "Give careful thought to your ways. You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it.

-Haggai 1:5-6

Haggai is not one of the better known prophets of the Bible. Not only is his book classified as a minor prophet squished between Zechariah and Zephaniah, it take up all of just 2 pages in my Bible. If you don't know where to look, you won't likely find it on your own. To look at it, you would think that it is the minor of the minors.

But Haggai's message is as contemporary as it gets. Haggai was a prophet during the time of Israel's return to Judah after years in captivity and exile. The people had returned to the land but they had not yet rebuilt the temple. According to verse 2 of chapter 1, the people's rationale is that the time "just wasn't right." So Haggai goes on to describe a society without the temple, a society that did not have God at the center of its life.

"You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it."

So what exactly is Haggai getting at here? What would a society like this really look like if we were to bring it into our current time? I imagine that a society like that would be plagued by an epidemic of eating disorders, either over-indulging and struggling with obesity or having an obsession with weight loss and having to look a certain way. It would be a society that would struggle with alcoholism, and illicit drug use. It would be obsessed with finding a prescription drug to fix every problem. It would be a society that put a high priority on fashion and chasing after every new look that came along. And in its obsession to get more and more stuff, it would be a society laden with a crushing level of personal debt. Credit cards would be maxed out and second and third home mortgages would be commonplace. In short, it would be a society obsessed with getting more and more while being less and less satisfied with life. Always having plenty but never enough. Sound familiar?

So what is Haggai's answer? Build God a house (1:8). Is Haggai serious? Is he really telling us that the solution to all of this is to simply build a house for God? Well, first of all, you have to understand the significance of the temple, God's house. It was at the center of Jerusalem, on the highest hill. Visually, it dominated the entire city, towering far above every other structure. But not only did it dominate the architecture of the city, it was the center of the life of Jerusalem and all of Judea. It was the political and religious center of the country. It was where people worshiped God and brought their first fruits for sacrifice. In essence, it was the symbol of God's Holy Presence in the life of the society. So what Haggai is getting at is that the people should restore God to the center of their lives.

Haggai seems to be implying that when we restore God to his rightful place, life will be satisfying again. We'll find meaning in our work and not just a paycheck. We'll enjoy what we have without obsessing about what we don't have. We'll enjoy food and without over indulging. We'll rediscover a rich and loving relationship with our spouse and not just empty sex. We'll be thankful for the clothes we have without having to be led around by every whim of fashion. And finally,we'll discover the freedom of debt free living and the ability to share with others what he has so richly given to us. In short, we'll have a purse without holes. So are we willing to take God at his word and start building the house?

Here's Life. Enjoy responsibly.

2008-01-29T10:09:00.000-06:00

Light is sweet,
and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.

However many years a man may live,
let him enjoy them all.
But let him remember the days of darkness,
for they will be many.
Everything to come is meaningless.

Be happy, young man, while you are young,
and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth.
Follow the ways of your heart
and whatever your eyes see,
but know that for all these things
God will bring you to judgment.

So then, banish anxiety from your heart
and cast off the troubles of your body,
for youth and vigor are meaningless.

-Ecclesiastes 11

Reading though Ecclesiastes can sometimes seem depressing. The writer (presumably Solomon) seems to always find the dark side of life, "Meaningless, meaningless..." It's as if life just does not matter because in the end, it's all over. I's so easy for us to focus on the dark and painful passages because they are so...well...painful.

But if we look closer Ecclesiastes, the author shares with us a real understanding of the joy of living. There's nothing wrong with enjoying your good health, and your youth. In fact the idea that one day it will end, should drive us to savor the good times even more. Good health and youthful vigor does not last forever, even though we'd like to think that it will. One day we will grow old. Our bodies will wear out and we won't be able to do the things we used to do. There are no guarantees that we will even make it to old age.

It's easy to let such thoughts kill our joy and lead to bitterness and gloom. We've all encountered older adults who are biter about life. Not only is their joy of living gone, but they want to take away what joy they see in other's lives as well. Misery loves company.

But there is another path that the writer points us toward. While we should enjoy every good thing that we experience in life, we should balance that joy by remembering that our time in the sun is relatively short. That should give us pause and keep us from slipping into unbridled hedonistic pursuits. The way we treat those who are older and crippled is the way we ourselves will be treated. We should care for those unable to care for themselves because we realize that we will one day be in the same predicament.

So if you are in your youth, enjoy your life and good health. The writer of Ecclesiastes is not insincere when he tells us to enjoy life. Run and play with all your might, get married and enjoy your spouse and children. But there is also balance. Enjoy that steak dinner but realize that there are many who are hungry. Enjoy your children but realize that there are many who have no children. Be thankful for the opportunities an joys that you've experienced, because one day, it will all be gone and you'll have nothing left but the memories. So make the memories now while you can. One day they will be some of your most prized possessions.

St KittsTrip Report

2008-01-25T14:27:00.000-06:00

We just got back last Sunday from our trip to St Kitts. We had been planning some sort of trip since Traci's chemo last summer. We didn't know exactly when we'd be able to take it but we did know that we were going sometime this winter. Finally, in December, we booked the trip for the middle of January. So now that you know the background info, on to the trip report.

About St Kitts

St Kitts is located in the leeward islands of the Caribbean. It lies just southeast of the Virgin Islands and just north of Guadeloupe. Like many of the islands in this part of the world, it is volcanic in nature even though it hasn't seen any actual volcanic activity in centuries. The northern part of the island is dominated by Mt Liamuiga a height of nearly 3,800 ft. The southern peninsula is mountainous as well, but fringed by a number of beautiful beaches. St Kitts is apart of the independent nation of St Kitts and Nevis. Population of the island is about40,000 inhabitants with about 9,000 inhabitants on the smaller island of Nevis to the south.The capital is Basseterre on the island of St Kitts. St Kitts and Nevis are former British colonies so English is the local language.

Getting There

We flew into St Kitts on a non-stop American Airlines flight from Miami. The schedule is very favorable since you arrive in St Kitts by mid afternoon. Recently, non-stop air service has been added from New York and Atlanta, making St Kitts an easy to get to escape from North America. Upon arrival, we rented a car from Thrifty. They are one of the few rental agencies located at the airport. They also have a downtown office in Basseterre. After going through customs, claiming our bags and renting our car, we were ready to hit the road and find our hotel.

Accommodations

Our accommodations for the week was the Frigate Bay Resort. I use the term resort a bit loosely since there are only 60 some odd rooms on the hillside property. It's located on the small neck of land that connects the southern peninsula with the rest of St Kitts. Frigate Bay Beach is located just below the property, only a 3-4 minute walk away. The rooms are laid out in 5 - 3 story buildings aligned in a row on a hillside above Frigate Bay. A large pool and bar area are framed out by Jasmine's, the hotel restaurant on the opposite side of the pool. We opted for a poolside room with a kitchenette.

Beaches

One of the main reasons for visiting St Kitts or any other Caribbean island for that matter is to visit the beautiful beaches. Most of the islands beaches are located on the south peninsula. There are several beaches here, each with a very distinct personality. We visited all of them and found them to be quite nice. They are certainly not world class by any stretch, nor are they the best beaches we ever visited by any stretch but the were nice nonetheless.

One thing that did bother me was the constant presence of trash. Nothing big mind you but just a cup or can here or there. It all adds up though. The locals would do well to have a cleanup day or at least put out some garbage barrels. I picked up several cans and cups while I was snorkeling. I even pulled out an entire chase cushion that somehow blew into the water at Cockleshell beach. It took some strength to pull it out.

Here is a quick overview of the beaches that we visited.

Turtle Beach

I had heard so much about how beautiful this beach is, I was really anxious to see it. It's located way out on the peninsula. You have to take the Kennedy Simmonds Highway to get there and it's about a 10 minute drive from Frigate Bay. Before the highway was built, the only access was by boat. The beach here is much narrower than I thought it would be. There is allot of housing construction going on there right now so I'm wondering how it will be before the beach is closed off to visitors. Personally, I didn't care for it that much. Too much noise to really enjoy the scenery and sound of the waves.

Cockleshell Beach

Cockleshell is sort of evolving into the new hot beach that everyone enjoys visiting. There are a couple of places to eat there and there is a beautiful view of Nevis to the south. The water is perfect for swimming and there is even some decent snorkeling to the far right side of the beach.If you are looking to find a relaxing beach with fun and activities, this is the one you are looking for.

Banana Beach

Banana Bay is located adjacent to Cockleshell Beach but it is less visited and less crowded. Really none of the beaches on St Kitts are actually crowded, except possibly for Frigate Bay Beach at night. If you decide to visit here for a day, don't expect to see anyone else. Take a picnic lunch and relax. For us, it was the perfect place to hang out.

White House Beach

White House Beach is not really a beach in the traditional sense of the word. It's rocky and you cant really sunbathe or walk the beach. There is some decent snorkeling to be had. There a 2 markers in the water that direct you to 2 wreck sites. One was an old iron ship while the other was wood.Not much is left of the wooden craft but the hull and corkscrew of the iron boat can still be seen in about 10-12 feet of water. It's about the best snorkeling we found on the island. It was decent but not great. There are not allot of large reefs or reef fish in the waters near the coast. It looks like the area has been thoroughly fished over the years.

North Friar's Beach

This wide Atlantic coast beach has some of the roughest and most exciting waves you'll see on the island. It's not safe for swimming but its very beautiful to visit and sunbathe there. If you walk to the north end of the beach and hike around the rock outcropping, you find a small cove where you can have the most private beach on the island. There are rarely people on any part of North Friars Beach.We saw only a handful the entire week. Most of the time, the beach is deserted.

South Friars Beach

This narrow beach has a few beach bars including the Ship Wreck. We didn't do any snorkeling there but they do advertise the presence of a reef just off the pier near the Ship Wreck Bar.The waters are clam for swimming but the beach is really narrow. There's quite a bit of construction going on at the north end of the beach .If you want to find the island's green monkeys, you can find them here. The Ship Wreck bar set them up a little tree house and they feed them sugar cane and other veggies.

Sand Bank Bay

This Atlantic coast beach was one of my personal favorites. The road to this beach i hard to find so there are hardly any people at this long bay other than a few local fishermen at the far end. The waves are somewhat large and there is a big rip current in the middle of the beach but you can avoid it. The sand is very soft and easy to walk on.You won't find much shade on this beach so wear plenty of sunscreen.

Activities

There's more to St Kitts than just beaches. We took the catamaran trip over to Pinney's Beach on Nevis on day. It was a great trip that we thoroughly enjoyed. We also paid a visit to Brimstone Hill. It's a restored British citadel on top ofa mountain in the northwest part of the island. And we visited Romney Manor, one of the prettiest homes and gardens in the Caribbean. On Thursday night we went to a local football (soccer) game between the first place Village Superstars and Trinity. It was a great match played at the local stadium, Warner Park. See my soccer blog for a full report on our adventures with the island's football scene.

Restaurants

Rock Lobster

We went to this local eater one night and had a very good meal. I ended up getting the steak and Caribbean lobster and Traci had mahi mahi. Both dishes were delicious. We ate outside on the covered patio since the weather was so nice.

Shiggidy Shack

This famous eatery is right on the beach at Frigate Bay. I had the jerk chicken and pork. Fantastic. If you have kids, bring them here. If they get bored, they can just run up and down the beach. You can either sit in the restaurant area or take a table under one of the beach shacks. We did the latter. The sunset was beautiful. This restaurant was right near the Timothy Beach Hotel and just a 6 minute stroll from the Frigate Beach Resort.

The Wharf

We enjoyed this place so much we went there twice. The restaurant is situated right on the water at the north end of Basseterre Bay. The evening lights are a beautiful site and you can even see the lights of Nevis in the distance. There is usually live music that cranks up around 7:30. They have an interesting setup as far as food goes. You order your entre, then go to the food bar and get whatever side dishes you want. They say that 80-90% of the buffet dishes are locally grown. Where ever they come from, everything is full of flavor. The baked plantains were the best I've tasted in years. Fantastic.

Odds and Ends

Money

The local currency is the EC or East Caribbean Dollar. The exchange rate is about 2.7 EC per USD. Most places accept US currency. Take the EC price at 40% and you end up with a pretty close approximation of the USD. Most restaurants include a 10% service charge in the bill so you won't have to add tip.

Driving

Driving is on the left. If you aren't comfortable driving on the left on narrow downtown streets, just take a cab. They are plentiful and most tourists use them as opposed to renting a car like we did. The roads are generally very good though but the beach access roads are little more than dirt trails. Even so, you can navigate them without having to resort to a 4WD vehicle. Watch out for the goats and cows. There are many of them roaming free on the southeast peninsula. It's not unusual to come around a corner to meet a big cow in the middle of the road.

Also, when driving downtown, be careful of one way streets that are not marked. There are many of them. Also, if you decide to go shopping downtown, go in the morning on a day that there is not a cruise ship in port. Parking is much easier to find.

Shopping

There is a surprisingly good shopping district in downtown. The cruise ship port (Port Zante) is like an open air shopping mall. There are some nice shops there but don't restrict your shopping to the port area. Check out the rest of downtown. The area around the Circus and Independence Square is very nice.

Monkeys

They don't have squirells on St Kitts but the do have monkeys.They reside all over the island but the best place to see them is the southeast peninsula. We saw several packs roaming free.They are generally shy but you can get some good photos of them if you are patient. I neverh ad to resort to feeding them.

Conclusion

St Kitts is a beautiful, mountainous island with genuinely friendly people. The beaches are not the best in the Caribbean and neither is the snorkeling. But the friendliness of the people makes the experience top notch. If you take the time to get to know them and their culture you will have a great time here.

St Kitts is forging ahead as an economy based on light industry and tourism as its base.There is also allot of building and development going on in the vacation housing market. At this point the island is surprisingly undeveloped and in many ways, unspoiled. They do need to clean the island up a bit and setup replenishment zones around the surrounding shores to let the fish population recover. Anchor bueys to protect the reefs would also help. They have much to offer on St Kitts, beautiful scenery, friendly people and a plethora of activities. They just need to polish it up a bit to make it a real gem.

Chase What Matters?

2008-01-24T09:54:00.000-06:00

I used to be a fan of Saturday night Live. One of the best parts of the show was the funny and outrageous " television commercials" that they used to stage after the opening monologue. Who could ever forget Dan Akroyd and the Bass-o-matic?Classic. What made these commercials so funny was their outrageousness. You could never imagine someone actually putting these out there as real products.

But sometimes life is stranger that fiction. When I saw the new Chase commercial on TV the other day I couldn't believe my eyes. In the commercial, a guys wife finally admits that they need a new TV. So the guy goes out to the electronics store and to the tune of Queen's "I Want it All" checks his credit card balance from his cellphone to see how big a TV he can get. Has this society gone just completely insane or do real people actually do things like this? Whatever happened to saving up money so you can buy things? If thy had shown this commercial on SNL a few years ago, it would have been pretty funny. Now, it's actually taken seriously. Can the real Bass-o-matic commercial be far behind?

Hate TV?

2008-01-11T00:28:00.000-06:00

If you're one of those people who just hate television, you owe it to yourself to buy one of these gizmos. Very funny!

Wii Guns

2008-01-09T11:20:00.000-06:00

We picked up a used Wii for the kids this Christmas. I've enjoyed plying golf on it after the kids go to bed. But I have to wonder, how long will it be before they come out with a Matrix game for the Wii?

A New Year

2008-01-08T16:02:00.000-06:00

The holidays were really nice but I'm just as glad that everything is getting back to normal. I've been working on a major software/hardware upgrade at work so I really haven't had time to blog that much. Next week, Traci and I will be vacationing on St Kitts. Ever since chemo, we've been contemplating taking a trip once all of the treatment was completed. It has given us something to look forward to. There are a few things that I have been thinking about that I would like to share but it may have to wait a few days.

Traci go fitted for her glove a week ago. It's a compression glove with the fingers cut out. The purpose is to prevent lymphedema. Anytime the lymphatic system is disturbed, there is a chance that lymphedema could result. Her glove and sleeve should help prevent it.

I hope 2008 is better than 2007.

Merry Christmas!

2007-12-24T23:00:00.000-06:00

On the move!

2007-12-21T15:49:00.000-06:00

"The White Witch? Who is she?

"Why, it is she that has got all Narnia under her thumb. It's she that makes it always winter and never Christmas; think of that!"

"How awful!" said Lucy.

C.S. Lewis - The Chronicles of Narnia- The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe

It always struck me that even in the middle of winter when everything seems dead, there is still life. Biologists tell us that even in winter, plant roots are alive and growing, hidden in the soil. Only in the Spring do we see it explode into our sight.

And so it was even in the middle of a lifeless place called Judea, in a backwater town known as Bethlehem, there was life, hidden yet growing. A Life and a Light that would change the world in unimaginable ways.

Lewis reminds us of that with the arrival of Santa into the land of Narnia. He is the herald of joyous news. Christmas is coming, Spring is on the way, and Aslan is on the move!

Where's Jesus?

2007-12-19T08:55:00.000-06:00

Traci and I went out to eat at her company party over the weekend. The dinner was great. It was at a restaurant in one of the old downtown hotels that had been restored to its former glory. There are also several shops there so we went a bit early to do a little looking around.

While we were there, I noticed that down the main hallway, there were children's drawings. They are all centered around some theme of Christmas and they were delightful. A sign above them indicated that they were done by children at one of the public elementary schools nearby. There were scenes on snowmen, Santa Clause, Christmas trees, and presents.

But something was missing and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Then I realized, there were virtually no drawings of Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus. After searching the walls which included some 200+ drawings, I found 3 with a religious theme, just 3. I like to think that many of the kids know the Christmas story and they just chose to draw another aspect of Christmas. It scares me to think that perhaps these kids just don't know the story at all.

I take some solace in the fact that my children attend a Christian school where the Bible is taught. But even there, some things give me pause. Every year we have a Christmas musical and this year was no different. Both of our daughters were involved and they thoroughly enjoyed it. But thinking about those drawings made me realize something, none of the Christmas musicals had ever had a religious theme, and this is a Christian school. What's wrong with this picture?

So I don't know what scares me more, the fact that so many kids in publics schools seem to not know the story of Jesus' birth, or the unwillingness of us in the Christian community to tell the story at all. Perhaps we are just a little too comfortable in our closed community.

But then there are some things that are encouraging. On Saturday night we went to the local Presbyterian church to see a play depicting the annunciation and the nativity. It was outdoors with real animals and it was cold. Nevertheless, it was fantastic and many from the community came out with their children to hear and experience the story again. And just last week our church hosted a Christmas program where local children acted out the story of Jesus' birth. It was an experience that I and many of the children will never forget. As our society becomes more and more secular, I think we'll have to be more intentional about telling the story of Christ. We can no longer depend on our culture to do it for us.

INTP

2007-12-18T11:20:00.000-06:00

When I was in college I took the same test and I came out INTJ. I guess I've become a little less judgmental over the years. You can take the test here.

The Light Breaking Through

2007-12-15T11:06:00.000-06:00

One of the frustrating things about this time of the year is the short days. As we get closer to Christmas,the amount of daylight we have in a day gets very short, even here in the mid-latitudes. In the upper latitudes, the days are even shorter. I took a ski trip to Vancouver a few years ago. It amazed me that they started shutting down the ski lifts at around 2:00 so people could start getting off the mountain. By 4:00 it was already getting dark.

There is significance to why we celebrate the coming of Jesus, the breaking in of the light, on what is one of the shortest days of the year. This might seem counter-intuitive, but to the early church fathers, this made perfect sense. You see, beginning with Christmas the days begin to get longer. So in a sense, the light is increasing. The light is breaking in. So as the days get longer and longer from Christmas until June 21, it is a constant reminder that just as the days are getting longer, the light of the Messiah is breaking into our world.

In the early church there was also significance to the longest day of the year. That was celebrated as John the Baptist's birthday. On that day, the days started to become shorter and shorter. After all, it was John himself who said,"I must become lesser, so He can become greater."

So as the days begin to get longer, Let it be a reminder to all of us that the breaking in of the light was not just a one time event. It is something that is continuing. And it will continue until he comes again.

SABCS

2007-12-14T08:36:00.000-06:00

For those of us interested in breast cancer research, this is a very important week. Oncologists and breast surgeons from over 80 countries will descend on San Antonio, Texas this week for the San Antonio Breast Cancer Symposium. It runs from Wednesday through Sunday. The symposium was started as a modest event back in November 1978 by Dr.Charles Coltman and Dr.William McGuire. Since that time, the SABCS has evolved into the largest event on breast cancer in the world.

In years past, some amazing news has come out at the event. Just a few years ago, Dr. Dennis Slamon announced his groundbreaking discovery in the use of trastuzumab (Herceptin) in the treatment of HER2 positive breast cancer. This years conference features some of the superstars of the oncology world: Drs. Jack Cuzik, Rowan Cheblowski, Hope Rugo, Peter Ravdin, Eric Winer, Sir Richard Peto, and many others.

If you're interested, you can visit the SABCS web site at SABCS.org.

A Church Festivus

2007-12-12T11:37:00.001-06:00

I read recently where Wade Hodges has proposed that their church observe Festivus. As part of the holiday, Wade proposed that the entire church meet for an "Airing of Grievances" so that everyone would have an opportunity to tell who in the church had disappointed them in the past year. Personally, I think it's a great idea. Just imagine what we could do with the Feats of Strength. "Festivus is not over until the Deacons pin down the Elders!" But wouldn't it be even better if we made it a brotherhood wide event and replaced our lectureships and open forums with Festivus. Can you imagine? I think I'll go pick up my aluminum pole.

Good News

2007-12-11T10:41:00.000-06:00

We got some good news yesterday. We got our CYP2D6 test back yesterday and we discovered that Traci is an extensive metabolizer of Tamoxifen. This means that the endocrine therapy will be very effective. I was a bit concerned about this since she has not had hot flashes. Typically, hot flashes are associated with Tamoxifen being metabolized extensively. The best of both worlds of course is to be classified as an extensive metabolizer (EM) while not having to put up with the side effects. Obviously, I'm happy with the result we got.

Traci also had to have a breast MRI on her right side yesterday. It was extremely uncomfortable for her. I hope we don't have to go through this very often. At this point, it looks like we'll have to have another one in about a year. It's going to take that long for the scar tissue from the hematoma on he left side to heal. Once the scars are healed, then we'll have the MRI to evaluate what her condition is.

A Shrek Christmas? Good Grief!

2007-12-06T22:57:00.000-06:00

So I'm watching the Shrek Christmas special the other night with the kids and enjoying the show when something comes on that astounds me. At one point in the program, Shrek calls his kids together to tell them the "Christmas Story." Ok, I figure he'll talk about the birth of Jesus a la Linus in the Charlie Brown Christmas. But no, instead of Baby Jesus, he starts to tell the kids the story of St. Nick in 'Twas the Night Before Christmas. Now that's not a bad story, but I wonder if kids even know that there is a religious component to Christmas. Are kids being taught anything about the coming of Jesus or even the story of Nicholas, the bishop of Myra?

So have we come to the point where we've completely secularized Christmas? It doesn't really matter if we call it Christmas or not. If we lose the story, The Story, we've lost everything. If Christmas is all about presents and a guy in a little red suit with reindeer and a sleigh, we're all poorer for having lost Christ. Where is Linus when you need him? As Charlie Brown would say,"Good Grief!"

God's Rep

2007-12-03T10:30:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I feel like we Christians are just a little too concerned about God's reputation. Last week I was involved in an online conversation about church discipline. Someone mentioned that we need to have church discipline to maintain the reputation of the church and Christ himself. After all, we can't have Christ's name drug through the muck and dirt.

All of that sounds well and good until you start to think about what Christ thought of his own reputation and what God allowed his son to go through. After all, if you are concerned about your reputation you don't let your son be born in a stable under questionable circumstances. If Jesus were concerned about his own reputation, he wouldn't be caught dead talking to a Samaritan woman and he certainly wouldn't associate with people labeled "sinners." And he certainly wouldn't allow himself to be humiliated by dying on a cross like a common criminal.

So what's the justification for expelling an immoral person from the church? We do need to keep the church clean don't we? Isn't Christ looking for a spotless bride to come back to? Sure God cares about holiness. But it's not because he wants to "show off" his sinless people. He loves and cares for us for our sake, not for his. And if someone will not repent, he offers discipline as a way of getting that person's attention so they will perhaps turn from their ways, not because he wants to keep his reputation clean (I Corinthians 5:1-5, II Corinthians 2:5-11).

"...hand this man over to Satan, so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord."

What's sad is when we as the church become more concerned about reputation than we are with people. When sins in the church are exposed, we seek to cover them up. "After all," we say, "What would sinners think of us is they found this out." Well, if pedophiles and religious swindlers were exposed instead of protected or apologized for, people might actually start thinking that we care for the victims more than we care for our own reputation. If we forget about our own reputation for just a moment, we might start acting more like Jesus and less like religious zealots.

"How did I get here?"

2007-11-28T20:43:00.000-06:00

The longer I live, the more amazed I am that I go to a Church of Christ. Someone once asked me,"What's that like for you?". To that I responded, "Have you ever seen that Talking Heads video?" I have to say though that I'm glad that I belong to a wonderful church family at Skyline. But when I attend other "mainstream" COCs, I still think of this video.

What would happen...

2007-11-27T18:30:00.000-06:00

When I was a kid we often got a kick out of the TV show Candid Camera. Every week the show's host Allen Funt would lead off with a question that started wit "What would happen if.." Then he would go on to describe some ridiculous situation to put people into, then show their response on national television. These days, you don't need a show like that, you just have to watch the evening news. So what would happen if you gave $4000 in credit to anyone that wanted it, regardless of their credit history? Truth is indeed stranger than fiction.

BCS Mess

2007-11-26T08:57:00.000-06:00

This is why I just give up on college football. Hawaii has no chance of getting to the national championship despite having a perfect season, Ohio State moves up in the polls despite not playing anyone, and Georgia has a chance to play for the national title despite not even winning the division in their own conference. When will these guys realize that it's time for some sort of a playoff?

Thankful

2007-11-22T21:30:00.000-06:00

Oftentimes, it's much easier to be thankful for the big things in our lives while ignoring the more simple things that make our lives enjoyable. One of my memories of my college days brings this into perfect focus. At the Christian Student Center, we had a special Thanksgiving meal every year the day before everyone left to go home. We usually had about 100 students show up for the meal. Part of the tradition involved breaking bread. Each table would have a small loaf of bread and we would pass it around, break off a piece and tell everyone at the table what we were thankful for. One year as we were passing the bread around, the guy sitting next to me said, "I'm just thankful to have a roof over my head and food in my stomach." A few moments later we started eating the meal and he piped up, "You know, these peas could have been cooked a little longer." I couldn't stop myself from laughing. How easy it is to forget the little things

So instead of offering a list of grand platitudes about what I'm thankful for, I'll forgo the obvious ones like being thankful for my wife and kids (and I am thankful for them) and serve up something more humble and less pretentious.

I am thankful for...

1. Getting to sleep late with my wife.
2. Little boys that will go to bed without too much of a fuss and not wake anyone up in the early morning.
3. Saturdays that aren't chocked full of soccer games, and craft projects.
4. Completed school projects.
5. Warm fall days.
6. A hot shower.
7. Trips with my wife.
8. A helpful and caring nurse.
9. Doctors appointments that are on-time.
10. E-mail and answering machines.
11. Traci's kisses.
12. Playing cowboy with the boys.
13. Playing the girls in fooseball.

I'm sure I'll think of a few more. How about you?

Rumors

2007-11-21T12:05:00.000-06:00

It looks like I may have inadvertently started a rumor. Over on Mike Cope's blog yesterday I say the title of his latest post "Wailing into Dancing." At first glance I thought it said "Walling into Dancing" and I made a comment about it. I hope someone calls Jeff before writing him up for engaging in some sort of liturgical dance. Of course, the rumor does fit with the title of his book.

Lymphedema

2007-11-21T00:01:00.000-06:00

One of the things that I've become concerned about over the past couple of weeks is lymphedema. Basically, lymphedema is a swelling in either the torso or limbs that can be debilitating if not prevented or treated. Depending on what statistics you read, it can occur in breast cancer patients at anywhere from 12-40% of the cases where a full axillary dissection is done. Sentinal node dissection can reduce but not completely eliminate the risk. Lymphedema can strike at any time, even years after surgery.

Fortunately, there are measures you can take to lower the risk or contain it if it starts. One of the risk factors is simply travel, either in a car or on an airplane. Traci wears a compression sleeve when we travel by car. We will be going to visit a physical therapist in Memphis next month to get a glove for her to wear when we fly on an airplane. The pressure drop in a cabin can trigger lymphedema as well.

To learn more about lymphedema, click here.

Retired

2007-11-20T08:38:00.000-06:00

As much as I hate it, it looks like "Behind the Counter"is finally hanging up the red vest. If you haven't had a chance to read this wonderful blog about Walmart, check it out. It's very funny and appalling at the same time.

Moving on

2007-11-16T13:17:00.000-06:00

It seems that we are finally starting to see a light at the end of this dark tunnel. In just under a month we'll be done with radiation then we'll be in for the long haul with our endocrine therapy. But even now, we are beginning to settle into a sort of normalcy. After chemo and surgery complications last September, we are more than ready for it.

This week, I started planning a trip for us to someplace warm for this coming January. We are looking at going to St Kitts in the Caribbean. Traci has been wanting to plan a trip since she started chemo. I was alway a little apprehensive not knowing what bumps in the road we'd be facing. It turns out that we have had more than our share of bumps. But now it looks like things are finally starting to settle out. The fact that Traci started thinking about the trip again is a good sign. Perhaps there is life after breast cancer after all.

Interview

2007-11-14T09:47:00.000-06:00

Our medical oncologist, Dr. Lee Schwartzberg, is one of the featured speakers on the latest issue of Brest Cancer Update for Nurses. You can hear the interview here.

Stepping out

2007-11-12T10:43:00.000-06:00

Traci and I got our picture made with Jane Seymour this past weekend at the WTHF Charity Gala. It was great to dress up and go out and have fun again. And yes, I'm standing next to the sweetest and most beautiful woman at the party.

Badgered

2007-11-11T00:34:00.000-06:00

You gotta love these commercials.

HT: Roby

Tux

2007-11-09T00:02:00.000-06:00

Today I rented a tuxedo.

My wife and I are going to a big dress up event this weekend. She's already bought a couple of dresses to choose from. Despite everything that she's enduring now with her treatment, I know she'll look fantastic. Despite my worries and concerns on the inside, I'll look good in my tux.

But it really strikes me that as much as we dress up on the outside, we are still the same people on the inside. I can dress myself up and look good and fool everyone into thinking that I'm really something important, that I've really got it all together. I can even fool myself that maybe I am a little better. But in the end, the image is rented. It's something borrowed from somewhere else and come Monday morning, I'll have to return it. I go back to my same old clothes that I've always worn and I'll go back to being my same old ordinary self.

But today...

today...

I rented a tuxedo.

Churching

2007-11-08T12:56:00.000-06:00

Is it just me or does it seem like there are allot of churches these days that are forgoing the name "church"? While we were driving around in Nashville a few months ago we went past several religious buildings (churches?) that referred to themselves as a Center or Outreach Ministry. I'm just wondering, do these folks feel that we have just about burned out the word church to the point where it doesn't even mean anything to the average person. Or perhaps the word church has accumulated so much negative baggage, we simply cannot even use the word anymore without conjuring up all sorts of negative images. Either way, it's a sobering development.

Thirty Three

2007-11-07T14:54:00.000-06:00

Traci met with the radiology oncologist today. After reviewing the CT scans he said that it looks like he will not have to irradiate the area where the lymph nodes were removed. He said that everything looks very good so he will do 28 treatments on the whole breast, then give 5 boost treatments to the tumor bed for a total of 33. At this point we'll probably complete radiation on December 14.

Dr. 38305

2007-11-04T16:00:00.000-06:00

While eating lunch the other day at home, I caught part of the show Dr. 90210. It's one of those reality shows that lionizes plastic surgeons who can straighten a nose or reshape a bust line with a masterful stroke of the scalpel. Of course you often see these doctors on television but rarely do you see the plastic surgeon who has to reconstruct the face of a patient who's been in an auto accident. No, I guess it's much more interesting for the average Joe to see another breast augmentation with wealthy Beverly Hills wives debating over whether to get a C or D cup.

All this got me to thinking about who my medical heroes have become the past several months. When you start doing research into what medical oncologists, surgeons and nurses around the world are doing to battle breast cancer, you become enthralled at not only their intellectual prowess, but their dedication to their field of study and their patients as well. There is Dr. Mel Silverstein who is pioneering the emerging field of oncoplastic surgery and intraoperative radiation therapy. Marisa Weiss founded breastcancer.org which has grown into the most trafficked breast cancer web site on the internet. Dr. Neil Love is doing some tremendous work with Patterns of Care in bringing together the oncology community to create consensus in the treatment of breast cancer. And finally, there are the oncology and hospital nurses across the country who bridge the gap between medical oncology and humanity and bring real care to patients and not just treatments. These along with the patients who bravely live their lives in the face of breast cancer are my heroes.

Perhaps one day, if I have the money, I'll start a show and call it Dr. 38305 (after my zip code of course!). For these are the people who are doing the work of saving lives and are dealing with issues far greater than the bust or waist size of some wealthy narcissist in Beverly Hills.

The Mountain

2007-11-01T23:30:00.001-05:00

 
Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Rads

2007-11-01T00:10:00.001-05:00

Traci started her radiation treatments on Tuesday. She had some soreness after the initial treatment which I didn't really expect. I thought she might start getting sore after the first week. Fortunately, it hasn't gotten any worse.I am a bit concerned since she is starting her radiation with the residual hematoma in her breast. It's going to take months for this to heal up. I hope that the radiation does not cause any additional complications.

We had a great weekend up in the mountains. We got to hike up Snake Den trail a bit. The leaves were still pretty green with the warm fall weather. They should peak late this year.There won't be allot of color though. The area is experiencing one of the worst droughts on record. My car broke down while we were there. Turns out it was a bad fuel pump. We had to rent a car to get home. I'll have to go back this Sunday to pick my car up.

The Gay Car

2007-10-30T10:35:00.000-05:00

This past weekend while we were visiting our favorite bed and breakfast in Gatlinburg, my car broke down. The proprietor of the B&B was kind enough to offer us the use of his Honda Element. I didn't want to take his only means of transportation but he assured me that he had another car he could drive so he didn't have to have the Honda to get around. The Element had been his son's car for just a short time before he decided to buy himself a Jeep.

When I asked him why his son had traded vehicles so quickly, I got an interesting answer."He found out that it was a 'lesbian car' when he got to college." A "lesbian car??" I didn't know that vehicles were divided by sex much less having a sexual identity or even preference. He went on to explain, " When my son went to college he was informed that lesbians drive Honda Elements. He didn't want to be identified as being a part of that group so he decided to get something different."

I was glad to have a vehicle to get around, but now I was a little more aware of how my wife and I would be perceived by other drivers. All of this was just a little too much information. At least more than I bargained for. Keep in mind that my wife still has short hair that's growing back in. I could just hear other thinking, "Look at that gay guy and that lesbian driving that Element!" It was a silly thought but I just couldn't shrug it off it.

As I thought about it some more though, I realized that there are some automobiles that become so entrenched in some subcultures that you eventually end up identifying that group simply by the car they drive. Could there be any more diametrically opposed vehicles than the Honda Element and a testosterone laden Jeep Wrangler? But there are other subgroup identifying vehicles as well. College professors and liberal moms drive Volvo wagons, hippies drive the infamous VW microbus, southern rednecks drive the 4WD pickup truck complete with gun rack and rebel flag license plate on the front bumper, and soccer moms have the ubiquitous Chevy Suburban driven with cell phone in-hand. I'm sure that there are many others.

One time back in the 70s, my father's car broke down. He was graciously loaned a car from a friend of his at work. His friend was an African American man and the car was a flashy Cadillac with white-wall tires, wire rims, fur around the rear view mirror and 2 pillows on the back dash. I just have to chuckle when I think of my dad, a white guy, driving a "black" car through a small southern town. It must have been embarrassing for him.

As for my wife and I, we were grateful to have a way to get around Gatlinburg, but we have probably had enough of being labeled as a "gay guy and a lesbian" for a day. We ended up renting a pickup truck for the drive home. I might just go out an get a gun rack for it and try being a "bubba" for a day. It might be fun.

Put the Balm On!

2007-10-25T15:25:00.000-05:00

Lately, I've been researching balms. Women use a wide variety of them for radiation therapy and there is a considerable selection to choose from.Here are the current contenders, don't laugh at some of these names. They are actual products.

Aquaphor
Biafine
Curel Ultrahealing Lotion
Miadrem
Radiogel
Radioplex Gel
Sween Cream
Udder Butter
Udderly Smooth

Hopefully, one or more of these will work even though they may be unpredictable. And no, I won't get a doctor to put the balm on!

Priorities

2007-10-24T13:39:00.000-05:00

I was recently reading a back issue of Patterns of Care. In one section, Dr Rowan Chlebowski addresses the issue of drug cost as a factor in whether women would take hormone therapy (aromatase inhibitors) for breast cancer.

The other issue is cost, and when a woman says, “That’s too expensive,” I ask her, “Do you have the money to pay for the medication?” Some women don’t, but many women, in effect, are spending the money on something else. Then I’ll ask them, “If you don’t want to spend the money on the aromatase inhibitor, what do you plan to spend the money on?”

That lets them know that I think it’s important that they’re making this choice. And then I remind them that this is quite different than considering a decision to get dial-up or cable internet, where, at the end of two years, you have saved $2,000, and you were willing to put up with the slowness of the internet speed.

I just had to laugh at the idea that some people would balance their life against having another luxury like faster internet access. Life vs Lifestyle. Are we really that materialistic and vain?

Radiation Plans

2007-10-22T16:18:00.001-05:00

Traci went to visit with the radiation oncologist today to get his take on whether we'd be able to start radiation therapy soon or wait till the hematoma heals up some more. Our surgeon and our medical oncologist basically left the decision up to him. At this point it looks like we'll get started a week from Tuesday. We'll be going to the mountains next weekend and we won't be back till Monday afternoon. We really didn't want to skip any treatments once we got started. I'm glad that we are finally getting started on this stage of our treatments. We don't know yet whether we'll have 33 or 36 treatments. Either way, this is going to take a while.

Salty Discharge

2007-10-19T17:19:00.000-05:00

I'll admit it. I am not a cryer. I'm not proud of it by any means. In fact, I envy those who can cry at the drop of a hat. You just seem to have more heart, more compassion when you can cry. And the converse seems to be true as well. When you don't cry, people tend to write you off as "cold hearted."

Crying though is different for men and women. At least it used to be. Females who don't cry have often had to bear the additional burden of being labeled an "ice queen." Men at least have had their traditional image of manhood on which to fall back. But even the traditional idea of manhood has been redefined in such a way the past couple of decades that crying is seen these days as being the "manly" thing to do. We have so reversed the old mantra "big boys don't cry" that we have made "big boys do cry" a significant mark of male virtue.

But there are times that I do cry. It often comes unexpectedly and is triggered by innocuous incidents. When it happens,I can go for days it seems and just pour tears. It's like I build them up, then there is a crack in the dam and before you know it, the whole valley is flooded. For a few days, I just feel tearful. Then I slowly rebuild my dam, pull myself back together again and the reservoir starts to re-fill. I wish I could release these tears just a few at a time but i guess that's not the way I'm built.

Update

2007-10-18T20:49:00.000-05:00

Traci is healing up well but she still has 2-4 weeks to go. It will be up to the radiation oncologist to decide when to start the treatments. Once we get started, we'll need to say on schedule. We'll be meeting with the RadOnc soon to decide.

We have decided for the short term at least to proceed with tamoxifen as Traci's endocrine therapy.

Before we start though, we want to make sure that Traci's blood won't causea blood clot like it did with the port-a-cath a couple of months ago. Tamoxifen has a tendency to create deep vein blood clots. We'll have to go to the hospital soon to get the tests run to make sure that we don't have a hyper-coagulation condition with her blood.

We also want to check her 2D6 gene to make sure that Traci can metabolize the tamoxifen efficiently. About 7-10% of the population has a defect in that gene that keeps tamoxifen from being metabolized efficiently. Last year the FDA decided to have all tamoxifen labels carry warnings about the effects of the 2D6 defect. When I asked about testing for it, Dr. Schwartzberg was surprised that I knew about the 2D6 (CYP2D6). He said that few oncologists were aware of the polymorphism in that gene. The had never run a test of this sort at the clinic before so he had to check to see which labs performed it. They finally found one and they'll be mailing us a kit in the next week or so. You can read more about the 2D6 gene here. At some point in the future, we'll have to decide when to switch to an aromatase inhibitor (AI).

Tamoxifen vs AI

2007-10-17T00:01:00.000-05:00

One of the frustrating things about dealing with breast cancer is that the treatments are constantly being updated. While that's a good thing in that you always have better and better treatments and information almost every month, you also wish you had that same information just a few months prior to when you were treated. So basically, the bullets in your arsenal keep changing.

We saw this recently with the article published in the New England Journal of Medicine concerning the use of paclitaxel (Taxol) as a part of the chemotherapy regimen for HER-2 negative breast cancer patients. Paclitaxel reduces recurrence by 40% in HER-2 positive patients but does little for those with HER-2 negative patients. Given this information, many patients could have been spared the pain and expense of this phase of chemotherapy.

Now, it looks like endocrine treatment might be changing as well. For the past couple of years, oncologists have used Tamoxifen for 5 years for premenopausal patients, then switched to an aromatase inhibitor for the following 5 years. AIs even now are used as up-front therapy only for postmenopausal women. Tamoxifen works by blocking the tumor cell's receptors to estrogen. Aromatase inhibitors work by keeping the aromatase enzyme from converting androgens into estrogen. The objective is to starve the cancer cells that feed on the estrogen in a woman's body.

Recently, at the 2007 ASCO Annual Meeting, Dr. Jack Cuzik presented some intriguing data on the use of aromatase inhibitors (AIs) as an up-front treatment for premenopausal patients with estrogen receptor positive breast cancers. Although there are current studies being done to provide some definitive answers to the question of which is the more effective and less toxic treatment(SOFT), Dr. Cuzik has studied some of the currently available data to provide some guidance and insight while we wait on the current studies to complete. You can read his presentation here and an interesting interview with Dr. Cuzik here. In short, Dr. Cuzik has shown that the current data strongly hint that not only are AIs more effective in reducing recurrences, they also produce more tolerable and less toxic side effects as well. AIs can be used with premenopausal patients by using LHRH agonists to suppress ovarian function.

So what do oncologists do with this data? Currently, practicing oncologists are divided fairly evenly as to what to do for premenopausal patients as are clinical investigators. Some, including Dr. Clifford Hudis, believe that oncologists must wait for a definitive word form the current studies before changing their treatment recommendations.

Dr. Hudis: In my practice, I treat these patients with five years of tamoxifen or I enroll them on the SOFT study. In this study, women with functioning ovaries and ER-positive breast cancer are randomly assigned to five years of tamoxifen, which I consider standard therapy, versus ovarian ablation with tamoxifen versus ovarian suppression with exemestane. An important point, which I explain to patients all the time, is that, although doctors may have biases, the existence of SOFT speaks to the fact that nobody knows the answer. It would be unethical to conduct that trial if we already knew which therapy was best.

From the Patterns of Care survey, it's clear that many oncologists are reading the handwriting on the wall and going ahead and changing their treatments now. After all, if you can save some patients now, why wouldn't you. At the same time, it makes sense to some oncologists to wait and get the definitive word on the current studies now in progress. To me, Dr. Hudis seems to think that its a black or white issue with no room for gray. Either you know that AIs are better or you don't know. So what should Dr. Cuzik do with his research? It's not a definitive study. So should he withhold the information that could benefit practicing oncologists and their patients? For practicing oncologists, it's a difficult position to be in. Do you bet a patient's life on where the data appears to be going? For patients, there are clearly benefits to working with an oncologist who is a visionary leader.

I'll end with this salient quote from Dr. Neil Love of Breast Cancer Update:

Anyone can administer penicillin for pneumococcal pneumonia, but it takes a master physician to sort through the increasingly complex tumor biology and menu of options in contemporary oncology and be as objective as possible in making crucial life recommendations for patients. As part of that painstaking process, we sometimes choose to weigh the risks involved and educate our patients about the unknowns in order to walk outside the normal barriers of decision-making.

The wisdom and courage that this requires sometimes yield highly satisfying results, and in that regard, somewhere in the hills outside Los Angeles, a woman glides effortlessly on her daily jog, silently aware that the uncertain steps she and her physician took some years ago may have avoided the nightmare of cancer recurrence.

How to Talk

2007-10-16T00:01:00.000-05:00

Time.com has a great interview with Lori Hope about how to speak to cancer patients. Hope is the author of Help Me Live: 20 things people with cancer want you to know. She has some specific advice on what to say and what not to say to those with cancer. It's definitely worth a read.

Only one thing I might add, before you offer help a cancer patient, make sure that you really want to help as opposed to just wanting to feel good for having offered. In other words, don't invite us or we might come. Managing treatments can sometimes mean calls late at night or trips to the hospital that you don't expect. Even sitting in a treatment room for hours can be mind numbingly boring to some but it's all part of the adventure.

One of the best pieces of advice that we received after the twins were born was to accept help when it was offered. It was touching to receive offers of help but quite entertaining to accept offers when someone was clearly just trying to be nice.

"I'd be glad to help with the kids or clean up the house sometime."

"Great! When can I schedule you?" (Cue open mouth, shocked expression.)

Ineffective Taxol

2007-10-14T21:00:00.000-05:00

It now looks like Taxol (pactlitaxel) is not as effective as was previously believed for certain types of breast cancers. NBC news is reporting that for women with HER2 positive cancer, the drug cuts the recurrence risk by 40% but there seems to be little benefit for women with HER2 negative cancer. Taxol can cause chronic numbness and tingling in the extremeties in some women. Often, the side effects recede but in some cases, the nerve damage is permenant. The good news is that as research continues, breast cancer is being treated with chemo and hormonal therapies taylored to the profile of the cancer type. It's not a cookie-cutter world anymore.

ABC News has a neat new breast cancer section on their On Call web site. Check it out when you get a chance.

Getting out

2007-10-13T23:58:00.000-05:00

We finally got a chance to go out and eat tonight. After a busy day with the kids, we went out to eat Chinese. It was a very busy day for us. I coached soccer practice this morning for 2 hours, then helped out with my boys' soccer game, then we took the kids to their school fall festival where Traci volunteered, then I took my younger daughter to her softball game. Whew. After that,we came home and rested up before going out to eat. We also got most of our Christmas shopping done. I'm going to bed now.

Uniform-ity

2007-10-10T14:25:00.000-05:00

A few years ago, the Christian school that my children attend, started toying with the idea of having all of the kids wear school uniforms. All of this was driven by what some of the middle school and high school girls were wearing to class, but strangely enough, the uniform policy was, in the end not proposed to the upper grades. Regardless, it was proposed to the elementary school as a "safety concern." Naturally, the whole idea fell apart and the proposal was dropped for a couple of years.

Personally, I kind of liked the whole idea. I had heard other parents mention how uniforms would do wonders for the students by encouraging everything from better classroom behavior to higher grades to less stress. On top of all that,it would be less costly to the parents to have to buy the latest fashions every year. Any change in policy that could do all of that certainly had my vote.

So I decided to look into the whole case for uniforms to see what the impirical evidence was for moving toward a uniform policy. To my shock, I found that there was virtually no evidence that uniforms did anything to help children towards academic achievement or better behavior. The only thing that uniforms did do was to make the parents and teachers feel better about the students. Of course it also helped the bottom lines of the uniform manufacturers. You can read the research here and here and here.

As disappointed as I was, as a marketing professional, I realize that you have to take the point of perception very seriously. After all, if private school 'A' and private school 'B' are implementing a school uniform policy, then shouldn't you be doing the same thing? After all, if you don't you might be guilty of the most unforgivable sin - falling behind. And we certainly don't want our kids caught in that cesspool of iniquity.

So, that brings us to where we are today. Our school started a school-wide uniform policy this year. When I asked why we were doing it, the president of the school just came out and told me honestly, "There is a perception among parents that a school with a uniform policy is a better school, and we are competing with other private schools for the same students." Fair enough. At least they are being honest with everyone involved and we aren't fooling ourselves into thinking we are doing this for genuinely virtuous reasons because, in reality, we are not. It's just plain old fashioned competition.

But doesn't a Christian school obligate itself to approaching problems of this sort from a uniquely Christian perspective? Does the Bible have nothing to say about the way one dresses, how we deal with differences of opinion in regards to personal choices or how we respect one another's differences? Does a Christian school deal with these same issues in the exact same way as a secular school? If there is no difference in our approach, then can we really call ourselves Christian at all? I wonder if we'll address those questions any time soon or if we'll just be satisfied knowing that we finally got everyone dressing the way we think they ought to dress. To me, it sounds like a plan the Pharisees would have loved.

Letha Hatcher

2007-10-09T21:55:00.000-05:00

Letha Hatcher passed away yesterday. You can read about her health condition here. She taught both of our girls at kindergarten at Jackson Christian School. She and her family moved to Arkansas to be closer to their grandchildren. Letha was also involved in the deaf ministry at our church and taught many children American Sign Language at school. Letha was an amazing teacher and a great Christian role model for our girls. We will all miss her terribly.

Vote!

2007-10-08T13:54:00.000-05:00

Kimberly Klein, the LawMom, is trying to win a $10,000 scholarship to cover some of the expenses of her breast cancer treatments. She is currently working toward her law degree and she's going through chemo right now. Her blog is one of 20 finalists for the scholarships offered over at CollegeScholarships.org. When you get a chance, please visit the site and vote for her blog. I know that she would appreciate it.

Update

2007-10-08T09:49:00.000-05:00

Traci has been doing better lately. She got to go to church yesterday. Her swelling is in a cycle of going up and down. It's going to take a while for this hematoma to resolve. Fortunately, she hasn't been in too much pain, just some soreness. We are hoping that we'll be cleared to start radiation in a couple of weeks. We have an appointment on Friday, October 19 to see if we can get started the following week.

Sitting on a Stone

2007-10-08T08:45:00.000-05:00

As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses' hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset.

-Exodus 17:11-12

There is something beautiful about those who do the work of supporting those who bear tremendous burdens. We know who Aaron was but little is known of this guy named Hur. All we know of him is that he held up Moses' arms during the battle. There are many people out there who do this type of work every day. They aren't patients or doctors and they may or may not be directly involved in the battle. But they provide an invaluable service by supporting those who are in the fray, sometimes just by providing a place of rest and support.

Some jobs in this world just seem impossible to me. One of those jobs is being a oncology nurse. The word oncology is derived from the Greek word ogkos, meaning "burden" and the suffix -ology meaning the "study of". Oncology nursing could be understood as sharing the burdens that people bear. Those burdens are often more than just the cancer itself, they are also social, psychological, and spiritual. After reading through some of the posts on OncRN and speaking with friends who have spent allot of time in hospital oncology wards, it's amazing to me what people in this profession are able to do. They labor in anonymity but are often more than willing to help patients and families with their needs. I am sure that the burdens take a toll on their families as well.

I can tell you that right now, there are many people who, like Hur, are holding our arms up while the battle rages around us. They labor often in anonymity and they don't get the attention they deserve, but what they are doing is invaluable. Without them, the battle would be lost. I am thankful for all the thoughts and prayers directed our way these past few months. But please pray for those nurses who are doing such a great job supporting us.

The New Normal

2007-10-04T08:58:00.000-05:00

I'm actually beginning to imagine what life will be like when all of this is over. It's easy to think that everything will get back to normal. But I am beginning to realize that there is no return to the old normal and I'm wondering what the new normal will be like.

I remember when I was about 12 years old, I took a trip with my parents to New Orleans. When you drive there, the quickest way to the city is to take the bridge across Lake Pontchartrain, 28 miles from Mandeville to New Orleans. While we were driving over it, a fog rolled in and for a time we could not see the side of the lake from which we came, nor could we see the side to which we were driving. It was strange, all there was was bridge and water without end. It was easy to imagine that it just went on forever and ever. But we all knew better. We know that at some point we would arrive on the other side of the lake but we didn't know what it would be like. We just knew that it would be different.

We Americans like to fix things and move on. I am asked all the time questions like,"Did they get it in time?" or "When will you be done with everything?" It's hard to explain and even harder to accept that you are never really "done" with this type of cancer. There is always a chance that it could come back. After radiation treatment, we'll be taking some form of hormonal treatment to starve out any cancer cells that are left behind. That treatment will last at least 10 years or even longer. In short, this is something that we'll be dealing with the rest of our lives. We can't just move on with our lives the way you would after fixing a leaky faucet. Some things just can't be fixed in the traditional sense of the term

So what does the other side of the lake look like? Right now I'm traveling the bridge shrouded in a fog, wondering what the other side of the lake will look like even while I'm beginning to forget what it was like on the side that we left. For now, all I see is bridge and water.

Better

2007-10-02T20:56:00.000-05:00

Traci's suture started bleeding a little Sunday night after I got back from Nashville. It wasn't unexpected and she didn't have any pain associated with so I wasn't too concerned. It was some of the old blood from the hematoma coming to the surface. Since then she has almost stopped bleeding and she's feeling much better. Hopefully, we'll get to start radiation in a couple of weeks. I am praying that we won't have any more complications.

A visit to the barber

2007-09-29T12:08:00.000-05:00

Some things just never seem to change.Traci went in for an old fashioned blood letting yesterday. Now before you picture our surgeon as a modern equivalent of Thodorick of York, let me explain.Some residual blood from Traci's hematoma was coming up to the surface of her skin and put pressure on her suture. To keep the blood from breaching the surface, the surgeon basically used the surgical equivalent of a Shopvac to evacuate the blood then re-bonded the closure with a suture and some glue. Hopefully, this will give Traci some comfort and help her surgical site heal faster. So maybe some day we'll treat patients with precision surgical techniques and chemotherapy. Maybe we could use radiation and...... naaaaaah!

Formulas

2007-09-26T09:26:00.000-05:00

Lately, getting Traci the right combination of drugs has been sort of a guessing game. Some of the pain killers cause nausea so if you are not careful, you'll end up reducing the pain but creating nausea in the process. We learned real quick that pain is preferable to nausea. At least you can eat what you want with just pain.

But knocking out the pain without creating nausea can be a bit of a conundrum. First of all, there are different sources of pain. Traci has pain in her breast from the hematoma and she has pain in her upper arm from nerve damage caused by the surgery to remove her lymph nodes. On top of all that, we have to continue taking oral antibiotics for the next several days.

We finally found a combination that works fairly well. Traci is taking Aleve (naproxen) and a hydrocodone for the pain in her breast. The pain in her upper arm seemed to be near the surface of her skin so we tried a topical solution. A sunburn gel with Lidocaine seemed to do the trick. So far, everything seems to be working fairly well. We are hoping to be able to go back and visit with our docs next week.

Dispair

2007-09-25T00:12:00.000-05:00

Friends sometimes ask me how I'm doing these days. To be honest, I feel guilty even answering that question. It's not me who's carrying the burden of all this. I'm not the one getting poked and chemo-ed and cut on. Until today, I've actually done pretty well. I focus on the treatment and trying to get us through the seemingly endless hoops we've had to go through. I don't know if it's just the fatigue of being in the hospital or the stress or what, but I seem to have a difficult time concentrating on work. It's like my brain is just not functioning like it used to. Kind of like having a mild concussion. It's like the enormity of it all is just catching up to me. Maybe I just need some sleep. I hope that's all it is. I feel like I'm being chased by something that is just too fast for me.

Hospital Stay

2007-09-23T20:25:00.000-05:00

The last few days have been pretty bad for us. We went in to visit with Dr. Schwartzberg on Thursday about the swelling that Traci has been experiencing. He immediately ran a series of tests on her blood. It turns out that her blood count was way low. In short, she had lost too much blood and was anemic. He told us that we would have to be admitted to the hospital in Memphis immediately and receive 2 units of blood. Traci also had a fever which indicated that she might have an infection. The internal bleeding in her breast created an environment where a bacterial infection could occur. He wanted to take some preventative measures to keep any sort of infection from becoming septic.

So we were admitted into Baptist Hospital in Memphis. We were completely unprepared for this. We brought no extra clothes, books, food, toiletries, nothing. Most of all, we were unprepared for the lack of care that we received from the nursing staff. Anytime we needed anything, including pain medicine or nausea medicine, we had to wait at least 45 minutes to an hour. Thank goodness we remembered to bring some of our own meds. After one of Traci's IVs ran out, we had to wait an hour and a half to have it changed out. Everything took forever. Even though some of the overnight nurses were very good, the overall level of care was terrible. We'll never go back to that hospital again. We did eventually get the blood we needed though as well as some IV antibiotics to knock out any possible infection. Traci's swelling went down quite a bit and her fever went away.

It was rewarding to see how people like my wife benefit from blood donations. I have donated close to 8 gallons over the years. Of course you never get to see or meet the people who receive your own blood. Traci and I have different types so she can't receive mine. I do like to imagine though what types of people have used my blood over the years. Now I've seen the face of it and it belongs to my wife.

We finally got to come home this afternoon. Traci has to continue to take some oral antibiotics and manage her pain with medications. Hopefully, her soreness and nausea will subside in the next week or so. Right now, our radiation will have to be put on hold.

Complications

2007-09-18T23:36:00.000-05:00

I looks like we've had a bit of a setback. Traci's surgery site started swelling yesterday. Early this morning she woke up with some extreme pain and swelling. We called our surgeon to get his opinion on what we should do. He asked that we come into his office to have his nurse look at it. We went in to see her early yesterday morning. At first, we thought that it may have been a pocket of fluid that could be drained. But it turned out to be a hematoma. We decided to try a bandage and some ice to stop the swelling since we really couldn't do anything about a hematoma without surgery.

Traci's pain seemed to subside, but later that evening it fared up again a the swelling continued. After consulting with the surgeon again, we decided that there was probably some internal bleeding going on that needed to be addressed. Since Traci had her blood clot a couple of months ago, she's been on Coumadin to try to get her blood thin enough to dissolve it. Right after the surgery, she went back on Coumadin and Lovenox. The problem was, the blood thinners were causing the internal bleeding. So we had to get control of the bleeding before we could move forward.

Our surgeon suggested that we get a vitamin K shot to stimulate the clotting factor in her blood. We went into the ER at the local hospital last night and got a vitamin K IV and some pain medication. The swelling was causing Traci some extreme pain. We finally left the hospital around 3:00AM. This morning we went back to Dr. Berry's office to evaluate the situtation and decide on a game plan.

Our choices were pretty simple. The excess blood could only be partially drained with surgery. In time it will be absorbed into her body. So the options are to either perform surgery to relieve the pressure and get some immediate pain relief or treat the pain with medication and wait to see if the swelling subsides. Since we have the bleeding stopped, we decided to go with the latter. So far it has worked. The swelling seems to be down a bit and the pain medications are keeping Traci comfortable. It will take some time to get back to normal but right now, we seem to be on the right track and time is on our side.

What a Weekend!

2007-09-17T00:04:00.000-05:00

My daughter's soccer team just finished an unbelievable weekend tournament. You can read more about it on my soccer blog. It was an incredible experience. I'm tired but jubilant at the same time.

Good News

2007-09-13T20:43:00.000-05:00

We got the pathology report tonight. It looks like the tumor had shrink more than we thought. The tumor that was removed ended up measuring about 1.5 cm. The initial measurement was about 3.5 cm. They took out 16 lymph nodes. Of those 16, 3 were positive. The best news is that the margins were clear and we won't need any more surgery. Traci will have a mammogram next week and we'll visit with Dr. Berry on September 20. All we have left is the radiation. I feel like we are running down hill with the wind at our backs.

Surgery

2007-09-10T16:10:00.000-05:00

Traci had her surgery today. We had to be in Memphis by 6:00 this morning. They got started about 7:00 and by 9:30 the surgery was completed. We ended up leaving for home around 11:00 and we were back by noon. Dr. Berry removed the tumor and took out the axillary lymph nodes on the left side. Traci has had a little pain but nothing major. I spoke with Dr. Berry after the surgery and he said that it went very well. The tissue will be sent to the lab today. We'll have more information about node involvement and the margins on Wednesday. It is possible that we may have to have some additional tissue removed but it's not likely. That will depend on the report from the lab.

Ave Maria

2007-09-07T13:24:00.000-05:00

Ave Maria! maiden mild!
Listen to a maiden's prayer!
Thou canst hear though from the wild,
Thou canst save amid despair.
Safe may we sleep beneath thy care,
Though banish'd, outcast and reviled -
Maiden! hear a maiden's prayer;
Mother, hear a suppliant child!
Ave Maria!

RIP L.P.

Settings

2007-09-06T10:47:00.001-05:00

What's most important is not the gift but how you hold it. Back when I was looking for an engagement ring or my wife, a jeweler friend of ours gave me a little insight into settings. He said that a diamond sparkles more if you can get the maximum amount of light behind it. Years ago Tiffany figured out a way to create a long thin prong that hold a diamond delicately and securely away from the ring. The extra light created by the setting made the diamond sparkle.

Some people carry their talent like a fine setting. Their talent sparkles not because their skill is necessarily better than anyone else's but rather in the way that they present themselves. It is a beautiful thing to see someone with incredible talent or beauty carry themselves with such modesty and poise.

Sometimes it is the job of others to illuminate talent that is not their own. I have always admired the work of great sports announcers. The best ones do not assert their voice or personality but rather allow us to see the gifts of others more clearly. Sometimes, those with the talent, need help seeing and understanding their own talent. The best coaches are able to bring talent out of a player that they would normally be unable to bring out of themselves. It's great to hear a coach at the end of a victory defer to the talent of the players on the field yet shoulder the burden in the shadow of defeat.

HT: John White

Honesty

2007-09-06T10:42:00.000-05:00

Jordan McCall has written a very honest assessment of her struggle with cancer and her theology. It 's definitely worth a read.

Radiation

2007-09-05T22:19:00.001-05:00

We visited with a radiation oncologist today. It looks like we will not be able to get Mammosite as we had wanted.We are still looking into the possibility of using partial breast irradiation. We'll be meeting with an oncologist at the hospital in the morning. Radiation will probably start about a month after the surgery. Surgery is still a go for Monday. We'll be meeting with Dr. Berry on Friday to confirm everything. Right now it's looking like an outpatient procedure.

Traci has been feeling great this week. Her strength is coming back and her hot flashes are diminishing. Barring any setbacks, we'll be done with this in a month or so.

Praise God!

I'm Back

2007-09-04T00:40:00.000-05:00

We just got back from a trip to the mountains over in East Tennessee. We've got a pretty busy week before next Monday's surgery. I'll post some more info this week.

Touched

2007-08-29T23:57:00.000-05:00

Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven.

-James 5:14-15

The Elders at our church this scripture literally and treat prayer for those in their flock as a responsibility. My wife and I couldn't be more thankful for them and their families. When Traci was first diagnosed, our shepherds called us and wanted to meet with us, pray and anoint Traci with oil. It wasn't anything public or showy, but private, and beautiful. It's not something done to bring attention to the ones praying but rather bring healing to the one being prayed for. Since then there have been many prayers for us, many involving touch and hugs.

On Wednesday nights, our Bible class at church has been studying James. I've never been a big fan of James. I agree with Martin Luther that it probably should not have been included in the cannon but, there it is. I do get a kick out of James' straight forward writing style. He's very Jewish in his approach to life. Life to James is in the doing of it, not just believing. This is why I think he has issues with Paul and his call to simply have faith in Jesus.

But James impresses me with his insight into human behavior. With these few verses on anointing, I think he has plugged into one of our most basic needs, the need for touch. We all need to be touched in some way. In the first century, oil was used to clean wounds. It was also used to make one look better. If you were mourning, you put ashes on your face, giving your skin a dull look. But a shiny face was the sign of health. But in either case, the application of oil required physical, caring touch.

So what is James getting at with this anointing business? Is this something that we should be doing these days? I think that he is telling the community to lift up those who cannot lift up themselves, physically or spiritually. If someone cannot physically care for themselves, even cosmetically, the leaders of the community should provide assistance. These days, that may mean providing a meal, helping with transportation or any number of physical needs.

James also understands that there is a spiritual component of sickness. Sometimes you lose the ability to care for yourself spiritually. Depression can set in and you can even lose the ability to pray. In those times, the community joins in and the faith of the group takes over. Notice that James talks about the faith of those praying, not the faith of the person being prayed for. Sometimes, you need to depend on the spiritual strength of others. Sickness does seem to have a relationship to our spiritual brokenness. That's not to say that the person sinned and became sick. James cites the case of Job who accepted his ailment as coming from God, but never accepted the premise of his friends that his misfortune was a sign of God's judgment on his personal sin. James understands that the whole person needs care in a time of illness both physical and spiritual.

So is anointing with oil something that churches should be doing these days? There's a couple of ways to look at it. You can take these verses at face value and simply do it.That's the path that many fundamentalist churches take. But you can also look at this as a cultural phenomenon. Anointing had both medicinal and cosmetic purposes in James' day. How could those purposes be re-appropriated into our modern culture? Are there any modern day equivalents to anointing that we could use today?

Our minister last night told the story of a woman in a hospital who was being transferred from ICU to her regular room. Before she was transferred,the woman's minister asked the nurse to pause for a moment while he prayed for her.While he was praying, the nurse carefully brushed the woman's hair. When he finished praying, the nurse quipped, "That's just the way her family would like to see her." When they rolled her into her room, the family was overjoyed. Later the minister was quoted as saying, "I prayed for her but the nurse did the anointing." Perhaps anointing is something that all of us can do for each other in many different ways.

Update

2007-08-29T14:33:00.000-05:00

Traci as been feeling much better lately. The side effects from her last chemo are now diminishing. She is having very few hot flashes and she's feeling much stronger. We'll have a nice reprieve between now and surgery on September 10. Traci's hair continues to grow. I can now see it from across the room.

I am trying to see if we can get partial breast irradiation as opposed to full breast irradiation. The side effects are not as great and it is just as effective. At this point, it looks like we will be candidates for3-D conformal radiation (3DCRT). We're meeting with a radiation oncologist next week to discuss it.

This weekend, we'll be going to the mountains. Hopefully, we'll get a break from the heat.